The Real Biggest Loser
Last night, I really needed to go to bed early. Earnings season is underway and I needed to be at work by 7:30 am. Much to my dismay, I stayed up until after 11pm because of my fascination with a number of horrible reality shows.
It started with "Skating with Celebrities" and "The Biggest Loser --Special Edition." I don't need to tell you how bad these shows are, but at one point Todd Bridges said to a skating judge, "What you talkin' bout!" He couldn't add "Willis," because he is Willis...He used Arnold's catch phrase. And, the audience laughed. In my opinion, Bridges proved to be the Evander Holyfield (of "Dancing with the Stars") of the skating world.
After flipping back and fourth over the hour, I turned to Bravo for "Project Runway." During commercial breaks, I jumped to "Tyra" where Miss Jay, of "America's Next Top Model" fame, taught some random girl to walk. (Note to self: Keep shoulders level. Swing arms in front of body. Swoosh hips. One foot in front of the other.) It was during this hour that I realized all these reality shows encompass all of my secret fantasies.
As a child, and as an adult, I loved Elsa Clinch. I wanted to be designing the clothes featured on her CNN segments and walking down the runway in them. A part of me has always wanted to be able to ice skate; I've even taken a lesson. I'm definitely someone who will try anything to lose weight, except diet and exercise, and envy those who succeed.
Thanks to the wonderful world of cable, several of my other fantasies have been fulfilled: "Growing up Gotti," "Gastineau Girls," "My Fair Brady," "Design on a Dime," etc.
I think this loser needs to move into "The Real World" and give herself an "Extreme Makeover"... Maybe I'll start with an "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" and move the TV out of my bedroom.
It started with "Skating with Celebrities" and "The Biggest Loser --Special Edition." I don't need to tell you how bad these shows are, but at one point Todd Bridges said to a skating judge, "What you talkin' bout!" He couldn't add "Willis," because he is Willis...He used Arnold's catch phrase. And, the audience laughed. In my opinion, Bridges proved to be the Evander Holyfield (of "Dancing with the Stars") of the skating world.
After flipping back and fourth over the hour, I turned to Bravo for "Project Runway." During commercial breaks, I jumped to "Tyra" where Miss Jay, of "America's Next Top Model" fame, taught some random girl to walk. (Note to self: Keep shoulders level. Swing arms in front of body. Swoosh hips. One foot in front of the other.) It was during this hour that I realized all these reality shows encompass all of my secret fantasies.
As a child, and as an adult, I loved Elsa Clinch. I wanted to be designing the clothes featured on her CNN segments and walking down the runway in them. A part of me has always wanted to be able to ice skate; I've even taken a lesson. I'm definitely someone who will try anything to lose weight, except diet and exercise, and envy those who succeed.
Thanks to the wonderful world of cable, several of my other fantasies have been fulfilled: "Growing up Gotti," "Gastineau Girls," "My Fair Brady," "Design on a Dime," etc.
I think this loser needs to move into "The Real World" and give herself an "Extreme Makeover"... Maybe I'll start with an "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" and move the TV out of my bedroom.
posted by sweetassgrandma at 9:58 AM
3 Comments:
Oh yeah, TV in the bedroom = bad.
Skating with Celebrities is my new favoritist lead-in to Project Runway, which is my most glorious addiction. I'm pulling for Kristy Swanson, or as I think of her. the original Buffy, before Buffy was cool. Bridges is a hack, he's stuck without a catch phrase so he swipes the security guard's? Cheap!
And, in an effort to one up you, although I missed Tyra, I did watch the American Idol Denver auditions... and I watched the Chicago ones the night before.
I never watch the show... no, just the auditions, because I like train wrecks, big off tune mockfests of trainwrecks.
I can't figure out why the judges liked Willis and his skating partner... Boggles the mind.
I have never gotten into Idol, auditions or otherwise...But, I have been known to get teary eyed over Ambush Makeover.
I totally thought you went to bed. I'm saddened by the runaway Runway. And we can move the TV into Finn's room. She loves the Law and Order!
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